its been a hectic week...

What a crazy week. Last Friday he asked me to ring him and straight away says he doesn't want to be friends. And then today, we're talking as if we were friends. I have no idea what the hell is going through his mind.

On the other hand, my visa is advancing slowly, but surely (at least I hope so)

My dad's surgery was cancelled, as the chemo and radiotherapy have narrowed his trachea, so they were unable to intubate him.

And finally, I saw the Planner this weekend. I love him to bits. He's one of the sweetest people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. Of course, if I could only meet a guy like him, I'd be super happy. Obviously without it being him. I'm not sure why I'm so averse to the idea of us being together, but I get the impression that if we were together we would both end up being miserable. There are plenty of things I love about him. But...I'm not really his type. And there's something that's off between us if we were to even try being in a relationship. It's hard to write about this cause I'm already super confused.

He's sweet, understanding, attentive, a great listener, reasonable, clever, ambitious, just the right amount of jealous, the sex is amazing (as in seriously mind-blowing), he's caring, funny, kind, super sexy and he's always there for me. So now you're probably wondering why the hell aren't we together, right? I wish I could explain it with words. But I think it boils down to I'm not really his ideal type...so because he would be miserable, I would be miserable, and we would never last. But it's not just that, I don't think we're great at bouncing off each other in conversation...there's not much banter. We're quite alike, I guess. But we make great friends! I do love him very much as a friend...but in spite of our history, I just couldn't see myself sleeping with him or anyone else again at the moment...And definitely not a one night stand. Funny how time changes things, eh? Well, I better go to bed.